人有兩種離開人間的方式：一種猝不及防，一種在預料中結束。

事後回顧，人們往往說寧可選擇前者，然而現實裡，多數生命還是以後者的形態結束。

如果必須選擇病痛，要在糖尿病與癌症之間二擇一，我相信多數人會選擇前者。

人們做選擇的依據，往往不是痛不痛，而是遠離死亡還是逼近死亡。

但糖尿病真的不痛嗎？真的離死亡很遠嗎？事實並非如此。

就飲食限制與病程煎熬而言，糖尿病患者承受的心理之痛，往往超越生理的不適，甚至時常伴隨不同程度的負面思考。

我曾與糖尿病患者長期相處：我的母親。她非常自律、節制，卻依然會因飲食限制而感到不快，雖如此，她仍是一位循規蹈矩的病人。

即便近距離照顧癌症患者，旁人也未必能真正體會他們身上的疼痛。痛到需要仰賴嗎啡止痛的時候，病人的思緒很難保持正向。

疾病是如何降臨的？你是否曾經想過，親友的哀號有一天也會落在自己身上？

我似乎一生都未曾停止記錄這些劇情與自己的關係。

 

當生命將盡，腦海重播的畫面多半是沒做好的事，或是該做而未做的事。

若大半生都忙於讓自己不快樂的事，甚至在忙碌時忽略了不快樂的事實，那只有在價值觀修正後才會明白，並生出懊悔。

進入知天命之年後，我把那些不切實際的夢想逐一丟進海裡，深知許多重要的事沒有「以後再說」的選項，只有「立刻去做」的必要。

在金錢與生命的取捨中，我的選擇曾遭到無數質疑與譏笑，親情的羞辱甚至一度讓我生不如死。

幸運的是，我終於掙脫過往被物化的價值觀，開始認真為「拒絕病痛」下定義。

這個宏願似乎自小便深植心底，終於得到上蒼首肯，讓我踏上連自己都覺得不可思議的「身體之旅」。

 

這是一段逆水行舟的旅程，充滿無窮寶藏，也有學不完的知識。

我在學習筆記中，為態度加註了「自律」：既是斷食給我的啟發，也是延遲享樂的提醒。

這裡的「身體之旅」並非醫學院解剖大體般的探究，而是和身體在不需消化食物的時空裡對話。

就像能從寵物的眼神讀出它的心意，你也能與身體建立默契。

深度斷食後的感知甚至超越過去的所有認知，身體送出的每一個信息，都能被即時讀懂，並且得到正面的回應。

自律，就是計畫性的回應身體的意見：飢餓時進食，滿足就停止；困倦時入睡，不再拖延；而斷食，是超前部署的回應，讓身體得到徹底休息。

 

對比舒適圈，紀律常常伴隨痛苦。尤其是在「時間到了就得吃」的文化中，有計畫的不吃，是多數人無法想像的挑戰。

只有願意相信的人，才能穿越這層門檻，快速領悟身體的渴望。

我記得早期的自己，常在穿越痛苦的過程中感到喜悅，那是身體與自律取得平衡的時刻。

只要把大腦的視角轉換為身體的視角，就能預見喜悅，也能轉換痛苦的感受。

 

在吃的情境中思考斷食，人性本能會抗拒；但在吃得過飽或不適的狀態下思考斷食，身體的回應往往會立刻轉為正面。

「以終為始」和「走一步算一步」的取捨，不是理性與感性的拉鋸，也不是勇氣與惰性的對抗，而是認清疾病的情境與健康的意境，並懂得知所進退。

我在記錄身體信息的過程中，貫通了上蒼給人類的生存設定。養生不僅是一門哲學，也是一門人性學。

沒有學習就不可能產生動機，而動機必須連結行動。對大多數人來說，這是一片陌生的禁地，卻是身體極度渴望的去處。

缺乏自律，所有人都將走向懊悔。

人們誤把自律當成難以承受的痛苦，卻忘了自律才是駕馭痛苦的鑰匙。

我的眼前只有兩種人：一種願意提早經歷不適，另一種寧可與生命豪賭。前者看清因果，後者只盼自己是最後倖存者。

 

人生最終的頓悟必然是：「天下沒有白吃的午餐」。

在理解「物質不滅」的同時，我也明白：「凡吃過必留下痕跡」。

這是身體對痛的提醒，也是我對自律和自然法則的全然臣服。

感謝斷食，讓我明白：「當斷則斷，不斷則亂。」

 

（我們終將承受兩種痛苦其中的一種：紀律的痛苦或後悔的痛苦。）

 

Discipline Does Not Hurt — Regret Does

There are two ways a person can leave this world: one sudden and unexpected, the other anticipated.
Looking back, people often claim they would prefer the former. Yet, in reality, most lives still end in the latter way.

If you had to choose a form of suffering — diabetes or cancer — I believe most would choose diabetes.
When we make choices, our standard is not whether something is painful, but whether it takes us closer to or farther from death.

But is diabetes really painless? Is it really far from death? Not quite.
Measured by dietary restrictions and the long torment of the illness, the psychological pain borne by diabetics often exceeds physical discomfort, and can even bring varying degrees of negative thoughts.

I have lived closely with a diabetic: my mother. She was extremely disciplined and restrained, yet still found herself frustrated by dietary restrictions. Even so, she remained a model patient.

Even for those caring for cancer patients up close, it is difficult to truly grasp the intensity of their pain. When morphine becomes necessary, it is hard for a patient’s mind to stay positive.

How does illness come to us? Have you ever considered that one day, the cries of your loved ones might become your own?
It seems that I have never stopped recording the ways in which these stories intersect with my life.
—

As life draws to a close, the mind tends to replay moments of things left undone — things that should have been done but never were.
If most of one’s life is spent on things that make them unhappy — or worse, spent so busy that they fail to notice their own unhappiness — regret only emerges after a shift in values.

After reaching the age of knowing destiny, I tossed every unrealistic dream into the sea, fully aware that many important things do not have a “later” option — they demand to be done now.

In choosing between money and life, my decisions have been met with countless doubts and ridicule.
The humiliation within my own family once drove me to the brink, where living felt worse than death.

But I was fortunate: I finally broke free from those objectifying value systems and began to seriously define what it means to “refuse illness.”
It feels as if this vow had been planted deep within me since childhood. And now, Heaven seems to have granted me permission to embark on a “journey with the body” so extraordinary that even I find it hard to believe.
—

This is a journey against the current — full of hidden treasures and endless learning.
In my study notes, I underlined “discipline” as an attitude: both an insight gained through fasting and a reminder to delay gratification.

This “journey with the body” is not an anatomical exploration like dissecting a cadaver in medical school.
It is a dialogue with the body in a space where digestion is no longer at work.

Just as you can read the intent in a pet’s eyes, you can develop a tacit understanding with your own body.
The sensitivity after deep fasting goes beyond all previous perception: every signal from the body can be read instantly and answered positively.

Discipline means responding to the body with intention: eating when hungry, stopping when satisfied; sleeping when tired, without delay.
Fasting is the advanced response — giving the body total rest before it even cries out for it.
—

Compared to the comfort zone, discipline often feels like pain.
Especially in a culture where “it’s time to eat” dictates our lives, the idea of not eating on purpose is a challenge most cannot imagine.

Only those willing to believe can cross that threshold and quickly grasp what the body is truly asking for.

I remember my early self — feeling a strange joy in the midst of pain — the moment when body and discipline came into harmony.
Once you shift your perspective from the brain’s view to the body’s view, joy becomes predictable, and pain can be transformed.

When thinking about fasting while surrounded by food, human instinct resists.
But when thinking about fasting in a state of fullness or discomfort, the body’s response often becomes immediately positive.

Choosing between “begin with the end in mind” and “taking one step at a time” is neither a tug-of-war between reason and emotion nor a battle between courage and laziness.
It is recognizing the reality of disease and the ideal of health, and knowing when to advance or retreat.

In recording the body’s messages, I have come to understand the survival program Heaven has written into humanity.
Nourishing life is not only a philosophy but also a study of human nature.

Without learning, motivation cannot arise; without motivation, no action will follow.
For most, this territory is unfamiliar and forbidden — but to the body, it is the most longed-for destination.

Without discipline, everyone will eventually meet regret.
People mistake discipline for unbearable pain, forgetting that discipline is the very key to mastering pain.

In my eyes, there are only two kinds of people:
those willing to endure discomfort early, and those willing to gamble with their lives.
The former see cause and effect clearly; the latter merely hope to be the last survivor.
—

The final awakening in life must be this: “There is no such thing as a free lunch.”
Alongside the principle of matter’s conservation, I have also understood: “Everything you eat leaves a trace.”

This is the body’s reminder of pain — and my own total surrender to discipline and the laws of nature.
Thanks to fasting, I have learned this truth: “What must be cut off, cut off; if you do not, chaos will follow.”